How to make sex tantric
Pre-SexMindset TheConceptofConsecration
Beginning your lovemaking session with what is called a “consecration” helps you to let go of any expectations of the ego. This means that you and your partner will be fully present with each other and will enjoy being “in the moment” together without any pressures to “perform”. Many men and women focus on orgasm before and during sex and it may just be this focus that lessens the sexual experience for them; sometimes even preventing erection and orgasm.
Consecration is concerned with surrendering all expectations around having to achieve orgasm and/or needing to perform for our partner. Taking time to bring this concept to the mind in advance of lovemaking, helps us to remove any performance expectations and makes lovemaking flow more naturally.
Surrendering to this, let us call it the “Divine flow”, allows for more unexpected and beautiful experiences to present themselves. When this flow takes over, both you and your partner will experience something magical, more pleasurable and divine together.
It is not necessary to be formal in order to capture the essence of consecration, although some tantric couples prefer spiritual formality. It can be as simple as taking a moment to think “I bring you my best self and I will be relaxed and in the moment with you.” If you both think something to this effect, then both of your minds and hearts will be open to whatever happens and you will make love with a with greater presence in the proceedings. The sharing nature of a consecration can also serve as a reminder of the beautiful sacred connection between you both.
Some tantric couples offer up their lovemaking as a consecration; offering to share their love with the world, universe or the divine. This is similar to some practitioners of yoga who offer up the “results” of their yoga practice to the world e.g. feelings of peace, love and relaxation. They consider this to have a healing and positive impact upon the world around them. It also enhances personal feelings of connectedness, wellbeing and happiness.
Here are two examples of a consecration offered to the Divine/the world:
“I surrender the actions, authorship and results of this lovemaking session to the Divine/Universe/World. I ask that this Divine Flow come in and guide and pour grace over both myself and my partner and that our lovemaking be of great service and benefit”.
Pre-SexMindset TheConceptofConsecration
Beginning your lovemaking session with what is called a “consecration” helps you to let go of any expectations of the ego. This means that you and your partner will be fully present with each other and will enjoy being “in the moment” together without any pressures to “perform”. Many men and women focus on orgasm before and during sex and it may just be this focus that lessens the sexual experience for them; sometimes even preventing erection and orgasm.
Consecration is concerned with surrendering all expectations around having to achieve orgasm and/or needing to perform for our partner. Taking time to bring this concept to the mind in advance of lovemaking, helps us to remove any performance expectations and makes lovemaking flow more naturally.
Surrendering to this, let us call it the “Divine flow”, allows for more unexpected and beautiful experiences to present themselves. When this flow takes over, both you and your partner will experience something magical, more pleasurable and divine together.
It is not necessary to be formal in order to capture the essence of consecration, although some tantric couples prefer spiritual formality. It can be as simple as taking a moment to think “I bring you my best self and I will be relaxed and in the moment with you.” If you both think something to this effect, then both of your minds and hearts will be open to whatever happens and you will make love with a with greater presence in the proceedings. The sharing nature of a consecration can also serve as a reminder of the beautiful sacred connection between you both.
Some tantric couples offer up their lovemaking as a consecration; offering to share their love with the world, universe or the divine. This is similar to some practitioners of yoga who offer up the “results” of their yoga practice to the world e.g. feelings of peace, love and relaxation. They consider this to have a healing and positive impact upon the world around them. It also enhances personal feelings of connectedness, wellbeing and happiness.
Here are two examples of a consecration offered to the Divine/the world:
“I surrender the actions, authorship and results of this lovemaking session to the Divine/Universe/World. I ask that this Divine Flow come in and guide and pour grace over both myself and my partner and that our lovemaking be of great service and benefit”.
RetainingyourSexualEnergy TheConceptofBrachmacharya
Brachmacharya in the context of sexuality is the containment of one’s sexuality. This materialises as men having multiple orgasms without ejaculation and women having implosive orgasms.
Tantra tells us that our sexual energy is incredibly powerful and that it is not something to be wasted. Through ejaculation for men and explosive orgasms for women, we deplete our sexual energy that could be kept within our being and used for higher purposes and accomplishments in all areas of our lives.
RetainingyourSexualEnergy TheConceptofBrachmacharya
Brachmacharya in the context of sexuality is the containment of one’s sexuality. This materialises as men having multiple orgasms without ejaculation and women having implosive orgasms.
UtilsingyourSexualEnergy TheConceptofSublimation
Now that we have learned the process of retaining our sexual energy in our body, what do we do next?
Sublime it up within our body. If you are familiar with the chakra system then you would want to sublime the sexual energy up to the higher chakras, ideally to the top of the head.
How do you sublime your energy? The following techniques help to raise your sexual energy so that you can be relieved of lower, heavier energy and experience higher states of consciousness.
1) The Mind: Where your attention goes the energy flows. Visualizing the rising up of all your sexual energy from your pelvic region to the top of your head is enough to help sublimate your energy.
2) Yogic Techniques: Uddiyand Banda (abdominal locking) is a great sublimation technique. In addition, there are some yoga postures that are incredibly helpful in raising the energy, these are Sirsasana (head stand) and Sarvangasana (shoulder stand). You will however need to undertake regular yoga practice in order to achieve the core strength and fitness required to do these yoga poses.
UtilsingyourSexualEnergy TheConceptofSublimation
Now that we have learned the process of retaining our sexual energy in our body, what do we do next?
Sublime it up within our body. If you are familiar with the chakra system then you would want to sublime the sexual energy up to the higher chakras, ideally to the top of the head.
How do you sublime your energy? The following techniques help to raise your sexual energy so that you can be relieved of lower, heavier energy and experience higher states of consciousness.
1) The Mind: Where your attention goes the energy flows. Visualizing the rising up of all your sexual energy from your pelvic region to the top of your head is enough to help sublimate your energy.
2) Yogic Techniques: Uddiyand Banda (abdominal locking) is a great sublimation technique. In addition, there are some yoga postures that are incredibly helpful in raising the energy, these are Sirsasana (head stand) and Sarvangasana (shoulder stand). You will however need to undertake regular yoga practice in order to achieve the core strength and fitness required to do these yoga poses.
SeeingtheDivine TheConceptofTransfiguration
Transfiguration is both the path and the goal of tantra. Transfiguration is when you have transcended the ego and see whatever you are looking at, whether it be your partner, yourself or any object and see it as it truly is – Divine.
As we reach higher states of consciousness with our partner, we begin to see past the superficiality of the physical appearance and see our lover as the Divine being they are.
This is where eye gazing comes in tantra. We can use this activity to connect with our partner in a space where the intention is to see the other and ourselves in our true nature. When eye gazing with your partner it is just as important to notice how they are seeing you as you are seeing them. Seeing your partner see you as Divine can be a beautiful and transformative experience.
Sit across from your partner for 5 minutes and really look at each other, be determined to see through their physical appearance and watch their light (and yours) shine through.
SeeingtheDivine TheConceptofTransfiguration
Transfiguration is both the path and the goal of tantra. Transfiguration is when you have transcended the ego and see whatever you are looking at, whether it be your partner, yourself or any object and see it as it truly is – Divine.
As we reach higher states of consciousness with our partner, we begin to see past the superficiality of the physical appearance and see our lover as the Divine being they are.
This is where eye gazing comes in tantra. We can use this activity to connect with our partner in a space where the intention is to see the other and ourselves in our true nature. When eye gazing with your partner it is just as important to notice how they are seeing you as you are seeing them. Seeing your partner see you as Divine can be a beautiful and transformative experience.
Sit across from your partner for 5 minutes and really look at each other, be determined to see through their physical appearance and watch their light (and yours) shine through.
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